Tag Archive: Lord

NOprah

Some people have just way too much power. Oprah Winfrey is one of them. When Oprah speaks, people listen. The problem is who is listening.

I’m talking about Christians here. Who is listening is who is giving her the power; and the more who listen, the more power she’s given and the more liberty she takes. In fact, Beliefnet.com (an ecumenical website) did an informal survey that found that, out of its 6,600 respondents, a whopping 33% said Oprah Winfrey had “a more profound impact” on their spiritual lives than their pastors and priests. From a biblical perspective, that’s unacceptable.

It doesn’t matter that Oprah said “I am a Christian” or that the Black Christian News Network (BCNN) has defended her claim. The “faith” Oprah professes to believe in is not the faith of Jesus Christ as set forth in God’s Word, the Bible. Hers is a New Age “gospel” that has wormed its way into homes via the television and gained control first over gullible women (see 2 Timothy 3:6-7) and now everyone who doesn’t know their Bible.

It’s one thing to be successful, rich and influential in the secular world. But when that power draws in Christians, now I’m upset. Oprah has infiltrated the Christian Church, and we continue to let her do it.

You see, after decades of first winning over housewives and then building a formidable, billion-dollar, multifaceted media empire, in recent years Oprah has expanded into a real spiritual leader who has been able to make the likes of T.D. Jakes and Joel Osteen — mega-stars with mega Christian followings — actually tip-toe around the Gospel of Jesus Christ. And the more they tip-toe, the more she gives them a platform.

At the same time they’re tip-toeing, and while Oprah’s influence over Christians grows every day, you have the likes of the Preachers of L.A. and their baffoonery undermining the Gospel in a different way. That’s a topic for another whole blog article, but it’s enough to say for now that there is a war raging against biblical Christianity on several different but simultaneous fronts, made possible in huge part by gullible Christians in love with Oprah.

How can I be so sure that’s what’s happening? Well, I’m not the only one who sees it. Read this 2011 Huffington Post article, “How Oprah Became America’s Pastor.”  Yes, you read that right: Oprah has been called “America’s pastor”! This article explains when and how Opray Winfrey has arrived to the point of being considered a spiritual leader and not just a media mogul.

I won’t duplicate what you can read for yourself in that article, but I will say that stumbling upon it in the course of my research only served to confirm what is already easy to observe about Oprah’s infiltration into the Christian Church.

Think about it. The only possible reason why Oprah would give T.D. Jakes, Joel Osteen or any other professing Christian a platform in the first place is because of their watered-down “gospel.” When the true Gospel is preached, it brings conviction for sin, with either of two results: angry rejection or a soul like the 3,000 who, after being cut to the heart by Peter’s sermon on the Day of Pentecost (Acts 2:14-39), said, Brothers, what shall we do? and then became born-again. If Oprah’s buddies Jakes and Osteen were preaching the true Gospel of salvation from hell, Oprah would either stop giving them a platform (like she did to that young lady on her show years prior who was professing Jesus as the only way), or start using more of her platform to spread the Good News herself. If the true Gospel were being preached to Oprah Winfrey, then she would either reject them or reject her New Age beliefs. At least by now.

Instead, she has done neither and in fact has in effect morphed the two messages together. Oprah readily aligns herself with Jakes and Osteen because, apparently, she is comfortable with their message. And sadly, so must they be with hers. I can’t help but believe they must think they can win her over to Christ. But what’s happened instead is that their compromising has weakened their message into something that’s no longer a match against her power and influence. A message that’s about God’s love to save one’s life more than one’s soul. A message that is so contrary to Holy Scripture yet so compatible with Oprah’s own pre-conceived spiritual worldview. In other words, their messages overlap enough to make for a mutually comfortable partnership. And I believe they overlapped long before Oprah’s “Life Class,” “Next Chapter” or “Super Soul Sunday” were ever first conceived.

All Oprah had to do in 2012 was say, “I am a Christian.” Apparently, that was enough for Jakes and Osteen to partner with her, for BCNN to defend her, and for Christians to blindly empower her. Because when she speaks, people listen, no questions asked. It’s Oprah, after all.

I told you I was upset. Aren’t you? There is so much evidence even on Oprah’s own platforms that what she defines as “a Christian” is worlds apart from — not what Jakes and Osteen present, but what the Bible clearly says. Her so-called “christianity” is really a New Age distortion that says God is an impersonal “force” that (not Who) is “in” all things, and our goal as spiritual beings is to tap into the “god” in each of us.

Furthermore, even more than she endorses Jakes and Osteen, Oprah endorses New Age authors such as Deepak Chopra, Eckert Tolle, Marianne Williamson and The Secret‘s Rhonda Byrne. They all teach heretical and occultic principles that put people at the center of their own universe where there is no sin, no doctrine, no heaven or hell, Jesus didn’t come to die on the cross, man made God in his image and not the other way around, and you yourself have divine power to create your own reality here on earth. What Osteen might call “Your Best Life Now” as evidenced by what Jakes would call your own “Instinct.”

This cannot be over-stated. If Oprah were truly a born-again, blood-bought, new creature in Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit would not allow her to be comfortable partnering with Deepak Chopra for their “21 Days of Meditation” program. Chopra is globally famous as a New Age guru who, at best, preaches a different “Jesus” (2 Corinthians 11:3-4; Galatians 1:8-9; 1 Timothy 6:3-4). At worst, his teachings are occultic because they encourage practices such as the Law of Attraction, which is popular in witchcraft.

To be fair, maybe as a babe in Christ (if she truly is in Christ at all), Oprah just doesn’t know better yet. Perhaps she’s excused, then. But then what’s Jakes’ and Osteen’s excuse? They are supposedly Bible experts, right? Have they not read those same three passages — 2 Corinthians 11:3-4; Galatians 1:8-9; 1 Timothy 6:3-4 — along with 2 Corinthians 6:14; Ephesians 5:11; and 2 John 1:10-11, just to name a few warnings they could have shared with Oprah? At least by now?

I literally gasped out loud recently when, while scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed, I came upon the post of a precious sister in The Lord about how she was enjoying following Oprah’s and Chopra’s “21 Days of Meditation” program. My friend qualified her participation by saying in effect that she was using Jesus Christ as her focus for the daily meditation exercises.

Unfortunately, that does not make it okay. That’s like putting a square peg in a round hole. If you force it, something has to give or break, and somebody’s going to get hurt. Christianity and the occult are polar opposites, and so much so that you can’t morph the two together in hopes that everybody will just get along.

So, I immediately prayed about how to handle my friend’s post (see Why I’m Reluctant) and felt compelled not to just let it be. Of course, I had a choice to either make a public comment or send her a private message. I chose to comment publicly for the sake of her many Facebook friends and followers who might accept it because she accepts it. I kept it simple and just said that her post almost brought me to tears (it really did), and then I put “Ephesians 5:11.” I didn’t quote the verse but just gave its address.

Within minutes, my comment had been deleted. That’s okay because, if nothing else, at least my precious sister saw it and hopefully already knew or looked up Ephesians 5:11, which says: Have nothing to do with the fruitless works of darkness, but rather expose them. And maybe she didn’t bother looking it up, in which case I’m still at peace because all I can do is present it. It’s up to you what you do or don’t do with it.

Maybe she just doesn’t know better either. People can genuinely just not know.

And that’s why I’m writing this article.

If you don’t know that, biblically speaking, it is wrong for Christians to affirm Oprah Winfrey as a spiritual leader even if Jakes and Osteen mistakenly have; and if you don’t know that Oprah adheres to New Age beliefs; and if you don’t know that New Age doctrine is anti-biblical and heretical; and if you don’t know that Jakes and Osteen have a compromised, watered-down, let’s-not-ruffle-Oprah’s-feathers kind of message that condones rather than exposes her and Chopra’s false teachings, consider yourself now informed.

To really help you see the danger of following Oprah Winfrey as a spiritual leader or why it’s wrong for Jakes, Osteen, you or me to compromise our faith for the sake of showing social tolerance, if you’re really serious, please look at the below Scriptures and consider them in their proper contexts on your own. It’s up to you now what you will do with God’s Word about Oprah Winfrey. Choose this day whom you will serve: those who follow and empower Oprah, or those who follow and serve the one true and living God, Jesus Christ?

John 14:6 — Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”

2 Corinthians 6:14-15 — Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? Or what does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?

2 Corinthians 11:3-4 — But I am afraid that just as Eve was deceived by the serpent’s cunning, your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ. For if someone comes to you and preaches a Jesus other than the Jesus we preached, or if you receive a different spirit from the Spirit you received, or a different gospel from the one you accepted, you put up with it easily enough.

Galatians 1:6-9 — I am astonished that you are so quickly deserting the one who called you to live in the grace of Christ and are turning to a different gospel — which is really no gospel at all. Evidently some people are throwing you into confusion and are trying to pervert the gospel of Christ. But even if we or an angel from heaven should preach a gospel other than the one we preached to you, let them be under God’s curse! As we have already said, so now I say again: If anybody is preaching to you a gospel other than what you accepted, let them be under God’s curse!

Ephesians 5:8-12 — For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. It is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret.

2 Peter 2:1-3 — But there were also false prophets among the people, just as there will be false teachers among you. They will secretly introduce destructive heresies, even denying the sovereign Lord who bought them—bringing swift destruction on themselves. Many will follow their depraved conduct and will bring the way of truth into disrepute. In their greed these teachers will exploit you with fabricated stories. Their condemnation has long been hanging over them, and their destruction has not been sleeping.

2 John 1:7-11 — I say this because many deceivers, who do not acknowledge Jesus Christ as coming in the flesh, have gone out into the world. Any such person is the deceiver and the antichrist. Watch out that you do not lose what we have worked for, but that you may be rewarded fully. Anyone who runs ahead and does not continue in the teaching of Christ does not have God; whoever continues in the teaching has both the Father and the Son. If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, do not take them into your house or welcome them. Anyone who welcomes them shares in their wicked work.

Please leave a comment and I will endeavor to reply as soon as possible.

7 Confessions of a Bible-Toting Scripture-Quoting Christian

I was called out about something recently and I must admit, there’s no way around it, I was totally guilty. Still am.  Crazy thing is, I’m going to keep being “guilty” of it. At least that’s the plan. And I hope I’ll be a “bad” enough influence on you so you’ll stay “guilty” of it yourself.

You see, I was told, “Oh, you’re one of those bible-toting scripture-quoting Christians!” And it wasn’t positive. Even crazier is who said it, which was — wait for it — another pastor’s wife! Another pastor’s wife!

My immediate response to her was, “Aren’t you?!”

That’s like one cop telling another, “Oh, you’re one of those law-enforcing, peace-endorsing cops!” Or like one employee telling another, “Oh, you’re one of those job-keeping, promotion-seeking employees!” Or even like the Belgium goalie telling USA’s Tim Howard, “Oh, you’re one of those record-setting, shot-rejecting goalies!”

What should be considered a compliment is uttered like a complaint, like you’re doing something wrong by doing what you and they are supposed to be doing. To have that complaint come from someone who is in the same shoes as you — the same role, the same challenges and, supposedly, the same purpose and hope as you — makes no sense and, worse, makes the accuser look like a hypocrite. Their own folly is exposed by the very thing they’re pointing their finger at you about.

I didn’t take it personally, though, even if the sister meant it derogatorily. Indeed, it is absolutely a compliment to be called a bible-toting scripture-quoting Christian. It means I’m being at least a little bit like those in the Bible who staked everything on what “thus saith the Lord” instead of on their own, each others’ or the masses’ fickle opinions and selfish desires. Sure, I got the twang. But I chose rather to take it as the compliment it should be while at the same time showing her her folly by reminding her she should be one, too. “Aren’t you?”

Who she is isn’t important and it would actually be unfair for me to say since our conversation was private. That’s makes her different than T.D. Jakes, Creflo Dollar, Joel Osteen or any other false teacher who makes outrageous statements publicly.  (See Naming Names). In fact, forget that we’re both pastors’ wives. Any Christian complaining when another Christian chooses to rely on the Word of God, it’s almost unbelievable.

Almost.  For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine… (2 Timothy 4:3a).  I was surprised, but I shouldn’t have been. That sister’s apparent diminished way of thinking about the Bible is increasingly pervasive in Christian ministries today. No, I was more disappointed, and I should have been. Something’s terribly wrong in the church when a true believer in Jesus risks ill will from a fellow believer for daring to think, dialogue and live according to His Word, and to encourage others to do the same. I actually feel sorry for her in her folly.

That’s why I must share with you, from a position of defense but much more from a position of humble beseeching, my seven confessions for being a bible-toting scripture-quoting Christian. My goal with this — as with everything I post on this blog and my Facebook page — is to spark new or heightened interest in the sheer awesomeness of God’s Holy Word. I’m not talking about worshipping the bible but worshipping its Author by learning and living by what He wrote. God wants us to be close to Him. But how can we be close to anyone we take little time to get to know? Prayer is essential. Fellowship with the saints is also important. But how can we really love the Lord our God with all our heart, mind, soul and strength if we’re not also hanging on His every word?

Confession #1 – I’m not there yet.
This article and entire blog God is using as much to speak to me as to anyone else. I, too, need to be reminded to read my bible, and to rely on the wisdom and guidance He provides through it. I have to fight the laziness, lack of motivation, day-to-day busy-ness, forgetfulness and occasional apprehension that can get in the way of personal bible study.

But beyond that, it doesn’t matter how long you’ve been a Christian, you will always have room to grow in your love for God, your desire to be close to Him and your efforts to put it into action in your daily life. Being a bible-toting scripture-quoting Christian at heart is foundational to that growth. Grow in grace and in the knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ (2 Peter 3:18).

Confession #2 – I don’t love anyone as much as I love Jesus.
I love my husband and kids beyond measure. So, like we all do with those we love, I show them. I show them affection, spend quality time with them, give to them, sacrifice for them, take care of them, tell them I love them, praise them, listen to them. I laugh and cry with them. I cook for them and go to the movies with them, which is my favorite pastime. Or I’ll watch every . . . single . . . Lakers game, from pre-season to playoffs.

But neither my husband nor any of our children ever gave me life — not the life I’ve been living temporarily here and not the one I will live eternally in heaven. None of them died to give me eternal life. None of them could. I believe they would give their lives to save mine, but none of them could ever save my very soul. Only Jesus Christ could do that and in fact did do that. And He did it while I was yet a sinner. That’s why He deserves my complete devotion, attention and obedience.

But God’s not tangible in this earth realm in the same way as my family. I can’t hug Him, cook for Him or root for His favorite team with Him. (What would I cook? And would He be cheering for both teams since He’s not a respecter of persons?)  Thankfully, I can certainly sacrifice for Him, tell Him I love Him, spend quality time with Him and honor Him, all in so many wonderful ways. The most important way, besides diligent prayer, is by learning how to be a bible-toting scripture-quoting Christian.

Jesus said, If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word (John 14:23a; see also verse 15) and Anyone who loves their father or mother [or] son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me (Matthew 10:37). His commandments — precepts, principles, wisdom, instruction, admonition, promises and encouragements — are spelled out in the Bible. So, I have them at my disposal to learn and obey and share as a way to express my love for Him. As much as my family is worth it to me, Jesus is worth it infinitely more.

Confession #3 – I am helpless, useless and hopeless without God’s Word.
What is it about All scripture is…profitable (2 Timothy 3:16) don’t Christians, including other pastors’ wives, understand? My very eternal salvation is affirmed by God’s inspired Word (cf. 1 John 5:11-13; 2 Timothy 3:15), and Christ’s empty tomb seals the deal when it comes to the all-sufficiency of the Scriptures. The Bible has all the authority, reliability and power every Christian needs to live and serve in His Name here on earth, and to have joyful hope for eternal life to come. No amount of inspirational psycho-babble from Oprah, Iyanla, Dr. Phil or their life-coaching wannabes, and no amount of materialistic positive confessions from your favorite prosperity preachers, and no amount of self-determined self-talk about your own self-worth can provide the same sustained level and depth of security, hope and peace through trials like a daily dose of God’s infallible Word. …[Y]ou have known the Holy Scriptures through faith in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work (2 Timothy 3:16-17).

Confession #4 – I’m afraid of my own folly and shame.
May I never expose my own folly by complaining that a fellow Christian is acting like a Christian! Nobody wants to be a hypocrite. Of course, inevitably, since no one’s perfect, every one of us says or does something stupid as a believer. But learning God’s Word and doing our best to put it into practice will help prevent such folly and the shame it brings to us and to the Gospel. May I never open up the Word of God to be blasphemed!

It is folly and shame to belittle the very thing the Lord Jesus Himself said sanctifies us: Sanctify them by the truth; Your word is truth (John 17:17). The more I tote and quote the Bible, the more of God’s truth — versus my own folly — will be reflected in my words, walk and witness.

Confession #5 – I don’t want to be led astray, or lead anyone else astray.
I don’t want to be silly (2 Timothy 3:6) or simple-minded (Romans 16:18). I don’t want to be like a child, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful plotting (Ephesians 4:14). I don’t want to be deceived. And I don’t want to be deceiving while I’m being deceived (2 Timothy 3:13).

The more I open up God’s Word, the more I learn His sanctifying truth — truth about the Lord, His character, His nature, His will, His precepts, His warnings and His promises. The more I learn God’s Truth, the more discerning I become to recognize truth and error, sound and false teaching, right and wrong. The more discerning I become, the less likely I’ll be led astray and lead astray others whom I’m supposed to teach or witness the Gospel to.

Toting and quoting the Bible helps to shield God’s precious people from false doctrines and protect us from the false teachers who use it to manipulate the vulnerable. Biblical illiteracy is chronic in the Body of Christ. As a pastor’s wife, a women’s ministry director and a Christian blogger, I don’t want to perpetuate the immaturity that plagues us, from the pulpit to the pew and from the airwaves to the world wide web.

Confession #6 – I want to be ready against the critics.
When someone challenges your faith or challenges a doctrine or practice you follow, it’s not enough to defend it by saying, “But I just know it in my heart…” or “Well, my experience is that…” or “I had a vision about it” or even “But my pastor says…”. Christians need to know, not just what we believe but also why we believe what we believe. And there’s no better source than the Word of God.

Often people criticize just to be controversial or manipulative, or out of pride and envy. But sometimes people really are seeking true understanding, and they don’t care what you feel, what you’ve personally experienced, what subjective vision you think you had after eating that left-over pizza, or what your pastor thinks. They want something solid, something objectively verifiable, something independently credible, not something easily suspect. Being equipped with a fitting bible verse is infinitely harder for the honest critic/skeptic to refute and dismiss because then they’ll be arguing with the Almighty Creator of the universe and not you.

If they’ll still reject you or belittle you, you can still walk away unscathed because you know it’s not mere man’s word they’re rejecting or belittling — if indeed it’s God Word in proper context that you’ve presented. You won’t be easily offended by the critics attacking you but rather will feel sorry for them and will know how to pray for them.

All Scripture is given by inspiration of God and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness (2 Timothy 3:16). Being a bible-toting scripture-quoting Christian gives you the thick skin you need to stand against criticisms (honest or not) and persecutions.

Confession #7 – My very life depends on God’s Word.
My husband and I have learned first-hand that relying on the Holy Bible gives wisdom and strength for dealing with the stresses, fears, weariness and bitterness that can result from multiple betrayals, alienation, loss and disappointments and eat away at your physical and emotional well-being. Relying on the Scriptures is the most sufficient thing that gets you through the fiery furnace un-scorched and smoke-free. Unless Your law had been my delight, I would then have perished in my affliction (Psalm 119:92).

That’s why I don’t believe you can ever be too much of a bible-toting scripture-quoting Christian — except if you purposely quote it out of context, cherry-pick scriptures according to your own preferences and ignore the rest, or possess knowledge but lack love (1 Corinthians 13:2).

That’s why I love Psalm 119. It’s interesting that the longest psalm in the Book of Psalms and also the longest chapter in the entire Bible (176 verses) has almost every single verse make some sort of reference to the all-sufficiency of God’s Word — His laws, commandments, precepts, principles, wisdom, etc. Apparently, the psalmist was an Old Testament equivalent of a modern-day bible-toting scripture-quoting follower of God, too! If I’m going to heed anybody’s example, it will be his and not someone who belittles life-preserving reliance on what “thus saith the Lord.”

I praise God for the authority, reliability and power of His written Word! And I feel sorry for anyone who complains when a fellow Christian chooses to think, live, serve and witness by it and it alone.

How has knowing or not knowing the Word of God helped or hurt your Christian life, service or witness? Please leave your comments and I will endeavor to reply as soon as I can.

A Lady First: Being a Pastor’s Wife

Reality TV makes a mockery of Christianity and I as a pastor’s wife am embarrassed and fed up. Not just for what these so-called docu-series are doing to open up our Faith to ridicule, but also for what a lot of pastors’ wives are doing in real “real life” that only perpetuates the problem.

And why do they always have to be Black, most of them? As an African-American pastor’s wife myself (okay, half, whatever), that just adds insult to injury.

True enough, TLC cancelled “The Sisterhood” (winter 2013) after only one season due to major outcry from the Christian community. But then Oxygen’s “Preachers of L.A.” came around just six months later and was popular enough to be renewed for a second season. Plus, I hear there are to be spin-offs in other major cities like Atlanta and Detroit. And now there’s word that a new reality show, “Preachers’ Exes,” is shopping for a network channel.

Overall, these shows and the professing Christians on them are embarrassing and misleading. Not all pastors are about the bling. And not all pastor’s wives are arrogant, entitled, self-centered, aloof, patronizing, untouchable, I-can-do-what-I-want-I’m-the-first-lady, got-to-be-the-best-dressed, elitist, biblically illiterate, selectively loving, gossipping busybodies.

But a lot of us are.

I’m not saying that every pastor’s wife on “The Sisterhood” and “Preachers of L.A.” are all of these things. I don’t know any of them personally (being among the Facebook friends of a couple of them doesn’t count). On the show, some were worse than others and, thankfully, two or three of them weren’t really any of these things (except biblically illiterate).

But the majority of these women represent a lot of pastors’ wives who covet the title and position of “first lady in the church” (a long-held tradition in the Apostolic and other churches predominantly in the African-American community) — often being groomed for it from the time they were little girls. And it’s to the ultimate detriment of the local church and the women, especially the young women, who aspire to be just like them.

Special attention and favor do inevitably come with being married to the most visible and respected person in the local church. The problem is when pastors’ wives get all caught up in the hype instead of gently resisting the congregation’s natural tendency to put them on a pedestal. Allowing yourself to be called “First Lady” in the first place is the beginning of that problem. (Read my Why I’m Reluctant page and Name Calling page to see why I would even dare call myself that in the title of this blog.)

I’m thinking about two examples. First is Myesha Chaney, married to Pastor Wayne Chaney of Antioch Church of Long Beach, California, featured on “Preachers of L.A.” (See my post Naming Names for the biblical basis for why I would, well, name names.) Part of their storyline was that he needed a second in command and she wanted the job. When he hesitated, partly because the church board was against the nepotism and partly because of his own concerns about whether she could balance it with motherhood and her other existing responsibilities, she started crying. Her husband then, um, submitted.

Not to belittle Mrs. Chaney’s real feelings, but with all due respect, I wouldn’t feel secure at a church where it seems that: 1) the second in command is easily moved to tears when she doesn’t get her way; 2) the senior pastor is easily moved by those tears because it’s his wife; 3) the senior pastor’s wife shows such lack of trust in and Godly compliance with his leadership of her, their family and their church; and 4) the senior pastor submits to his wife and not the other way around when it comes to a major matter of the church, which makes me wonder how much she was maybe already kind of running things behind the scenes before this and at the church family’s expense.

This is even before I mention the fact that God did not ordain for women to be in authority over men in the first place. But that’s another article (or two) for another time.

The second example is Lady Bridget Hilliard, wife of Pastor I.V. Hilliard of New Light Christian Center in Houston, Texas. For her 50th birthday a few years ago, the church’s website had a microsite inviting people to her party for a $100 per person admission price. The party planning committee even included a list of suggested gift ideas, making it plain that Mrs. Hilliard deserved nothing less than “monetary gifts, designer handbags (Gucci, Chanel and Louis Vitton) and gift certificates (Neiman Marcus, Saks Fifth Avenue, Escade).” (Houston Press article, February 9, 2006). Mrs. Hilliard was already driving a Bentley with the license plate, “Mrs. Attitude.” (Guess what her husband’s said.) Enough said.

That party’s old news by now, of course, and I read the microsite was taken down shortly after the Houston Press article came out. What I have not read anywhere is whether or not the Hilliards ever apologized for it or retracted that gifts list. I’m not saying they never did apologize; I’m just saying, in all the reading I did do in my research, I didn’t read anything that said they had.

Maybe now I’m the one who sounds arrogant, elitist, unloving and gossipy. And jealous. Let me briefly address all that. It’s important you know my heart before I continue.

Firstly, am I arrogant or elitist? See my Who She Think She Is? page. Anything I think I know is not because I think I have any superior insight or privileged wisdom. All I have is the same degree of access to reality shows and The Word Network, the Internet and Google, and — most importantly of all — the Holy Bible as anybody else; and I have been given the same basic degree of intelligence, common sense and potential ability to discern as most people; and I am therefore no more capable than anybody else to just, simply, make reasonable observations about things and evaluate how those things measure up against the test of the final authority of God’s Word.

Indeed, this very blog is intended, not to prove anything about myself, but to prove that all of us have the ability to think for ourselves about our Faith and our churches. This, in spite of the fact that, as I’ve said elsewhere, it’s going to ruffle some feathers in a lot of church hats. If that’s what it takes, so be it.

Am I gossiping? No, because I’m only talking about what was done publicly, and my assessment of it is my personal opinion based on my comparison of it against the Scriptures. I’m not addressing anything that isn’t already public knowledge.

Am I being unloving. No, because telling truthful observations about someone and loving them are not mutually exclusive. If they put themselves out there (on television and their websites), as long as I’m not calling them out their name or slandering (lying about) them, then no one can conclude I don’t love them. Am I aware what I’m saying could hurt their or their followers’ feelings and therefore that’s how I could be unloving? No, even then, my hope is that those women and their followers will be ultimately helped out of this faulty and potentially dangerous way of thinking in the church. Any short-term hurt is outweighed by that long-term goal. And that long-term goal is very loving, indeed.

Am I jealous? Hmm. Jealous of what? Material things? Status? Attention? Prominence? Popularity? If my focus were on me, if I were a “first lady” and a “Mrs. Attitude” like Bridget Hilliard, then of course being jealous and competitive would come with the territory. But I don’t want the title “First Lady.” Calling myself “Mrs. Davis” is plenty satisfying enough, thank you very much.

Furthermore, I don’t covet material things and all the rest. Sure, I like nice things, and sure, who doesn’t like at least a little attention. But these are things the carnal man desires, while God says that life does not consist in the abundance of one’s possessions (Luke 12:15), don’t store up for yourselves treasures on earth (Matthew 6:19), and be content (1 Timothy 6:6-8). In other words, balance. Biblical balance. I love and fear Almighty God too much, and my burden to warn Christian women is too heavy (see 2 Timothy 3:6), for me to be secretly pining for whatever those “First Ladies” have that I don’t have.

Here’s why I’m embarrassed and fed up with the whole “First Lady in the church” thing — whether it’s a pastor’s wife’s title or just her attitude:

Too many “First Ladies” fail to see that being a pastor’s wife is a privilege, not an entitlement. It’s a calling, not a status level. It’s a position of support and service, not of being served. It’s an opportunity for you to bless, not control. It’s about modeling a pricelessly adorned spirit, not the latest Gucci handbag. It’s a responsibility to give God all the glory, not share His glory with your husband and yourself. They fail to see it, and like sheep being led astray, their congregations fail to see it, too.

I’ve been a pastor’s wife for more than 21 years. With all of its perks come a lot of pitfalls, this I know first-hand. That’s why I also know, don’t seek to be a pastor’s wife unless you know you’re called by God. Be careful what you ask for, because if your pastor husband is going to do his job right, you as his biggest supporter and disciple are going to have to do your job right.

That means, first lady, you’re going to have to endure a lot of sacrifice, scrutiny, tests and trials, second-guessing, attacks on your marriage and family, hurt and pain, and loneliness. The fruits of the Spirit — love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 6:22-24) — will have to be in operation on double-time. And let me throw in Galatians 6:26 for good measure: “Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying one another.”

Of course, being a pastor’s wife also means being blessed to serve and help, to see the fruit of your labor in teaching and guiding your precious sisters and young women (Titus 2:3-5), and first and foremost being a fitting helpmate to your husband’s work in his ministry witnessing to lost souls and discipling believers into growing in their Faith.

In short, don’t seek after being a “first lady.” Be a “lady first.” (Thank you for that, Brother Lawrence E. Webb.)

A “lady first” is a woman (pastor’s wife or not) after God’s own heart. First.

Then it’s the heart of her husband, then her children (yes, after the husband), then the people in the church, then the larger community. Like the Proverbs 31 woman (verses 10-31), such a lady is content with her husband and children giving her honor even if no one else ever does (cf. verses 28-29). Moreover, it’s her good deeds — not her title, position, possessions or fashion style — that garner admiration outside her home (verses 30-31).

Similarly, a “lady first” strives to do what women are instructed in Titus 2:3-5: be mindful of their awesome responsibility to younger women, live holy lives, avoid idolatry, don’t gossip, teach biblical things, be level-headed, love and yield to their husbands, prefer and nurture their children, and make the home a pleasant, well-managed and healthy refuge for the family and guests.

Actually, verse 5 of Titus 2 is the only place in the Bible where it tells women in particular to not open up the Word of God to be blasphemed — maligned, cheapened, dishonored, discredited. How did/do most of the pastors’ wives on “The Sisterhood,” “Preachers of L.A.” and those you know or heard of personally, publicly live out that clear admonition?

Being a pastor’s wife called by God and not your ego, calls for being a lady first. And being a lady first, well, that’s hard enough as it is, I have to admit! (Or is it just me?!) It’s a constant striving already to be the Proverbs 31/Ephesians 5/Titus 2/1 Peter 3 woman even without the added responsibility of supporting a husband’s ministry.

But being a lady first, more than being a first lady, is what is most beautiful in the eyes of your husband, your children, your fellow church members and, most importantly of all, your Heavenly Father.

I welcome your comments and will respond as soon as I can.

The Majority Fools

The “majority rules” way of picking sides is not always smart. Especially when it comes to the things of God and matters of the kingdom. Often, as the majority rules, the majority fools.

We’ve all seen examples of this in the world, such as when kids side with the bully in a school yard fight, or when juries convict innocent men to life or death sentences who are later exonerated.

I saw this happen to a pastor once. Not in a court of law, mind you, and not quite on a school yard. But this pastor was wrongfully accused of being a “striker brawler” by the unanimous vote of his deacon board even though they knew he had never even threatened to hit anyone let alone actually hit anyone. All it took, apparently, was a grossly embellished story by one of the deacons who knew it would be his word against the pastor’s because there were no other known eyewitnesses to the incident. Couple that with the fact that this deacon always prided himself on his ability to talk anyone into the ground until they cried “Uncle!” — except the pastor, who knew it takes more than sheer quantity of words and cleverness to make good ministry decisions. 

Despite the overwhelming lack of independent evidence, the deacon’s powers of persuasion worked on the other deacons. The pastor was quickly dismissed from his post and banned from the church with one day’s notice, without his back pay or severance pay, and without an opportunity to give his side of the story to the congregation.

Many of the church members and other collaborators with the ministry took the deacons’ unanimous vote as evidence enough of the pastor’s guilt. Most did not. Either way, the majority rules mentality caused a devastating church split. An eyewitness to the incident later revealed himself to the pastor to corroborate the pastor’s account. But it was too late.

As the majority ruled, the majority fooled.

This “majority fools” concept is of course not new. One of the best biblical examples is found in Numbers 13 and 14. God told Moses He was going to give a certain area of land to the people of Israel, but first He had him choose twelve men to go and spy things out. All twelve men came back agreeing it was a rich land, but the whopping majority of them doubted they could take it — and convinced all the people of the same. Only two of the spies, Joshua and Caleb, had faith to believe God would be with them to give them the victory.  All the people picked the side of the majority, to the point that they even talked about stoning the two dissenters!

So, what happened? God got angry because of the people’s contempt and decided everyone of that generation would not ever enter the promised land except Joshua and Caleb and their families. The ten men who spread the bad report, causing the people to grumble and rebel against The Lord, were struck down with a plague. It was at that point that the people decided to go and try to take the land, but it was too late. God had already withdrawn His will for them to succeed and they were attacked and chased away by the enemy.

The most obvious and notorious example is that of the Passion of Jesus Christ. After being betrayed by one of His closest disciples, Jesus stood trial in a kangaroo court as the religious leaders presented false witnesses against Him. He was convicted, beaten and then scourged within an inch of His life. Worst of all, the same people who had just hailed Him as King during His Triumphant Entry were now zealous for His death! They mocked Him, spit on Him, struck Him repeatedly and cursed at Him as He carried His Cross all the way up the hill to Calvary. The crowds who were once praising Jesus, now wanted Him dead. Just like that.

I’m not using these stories to prophesy or even hint anything about what did, should or might happen to those deacons and the church members and collaborators who sided with them. All I’m pointing out is that, when it comes to matters of God’s Kingdom, in some form or another: 

When the majority fools, destruction often follows.

Of course, the only way the majority fools is because people let the majority rule. Not that people want to be made fools. But people are either lazy enough to let the more vocal or prominent do their thinking for them; or they’re naive enough to think “majority rules” is a reliable way to tell right from wrong; or they have their own selfish ulterior motives.

Or, they just always automatically follow the crowd without a second thought.

That happens a lot among God’s people, especially today. Unsuspecting sheep blindly follow unsuspecting sheep who blindly follow the most popular “shepherds” — i.e., pastors, teachers, authors, life coaches, conference speakers and talk show personalities — who can then lead the sheep any way they want.

One pastor I admire described a spot-on parallel between God’s sheep (believers) and real sheep. In a flock of real sheep, the ones behind automatically follow the ones ahead. That’s why it’s easy to lead a whole flock to the slaughter, or at least to the shearing. Sheep are short-sighted and gullible because they by nature just follow each other without checking to see where they’re headed.

In addition, their wool is sheared because if it wasn’t, infection could spread quickly. Since sheep tend to stand and move tightly together in a filthy environment (they stand in their own and each other’s excrement), long wool attracts the filth and gets transferred easily from one sheep to the next.  Keeping them clipped and periodically moving them forward helps protect the whole flock. Plus, sheep dogs, while often a scary annoyance to the sheep, are invaluable for protecting them from ravenous wolves and preventing the sheep in front from straying in the wrong direction where the whole flock will follow.

See how important the sheep are to the shepherd? That’s why there are all these efforts to keep them safe and healthy. They are invaluable even if they are vulnerable.

And that’s why, in the church, a good shepherd of God’s flock understands the level of responsibility his job holds to keep the sheep safe and healthy in light of their tendency to kind of go with the flow of the whole crowd. He recognizes the value but also the vulnerability of the sheep God puts in his care. So, he uses the purging and pruning and forward-moving (spiritual growth) effects of God’s Word, the Bible, to keep them free of “infection” so that it won’t spread to the whole flock. And he supplements his sermons with ministry tools used like sheep dogs — Bible studies, Bible reading programs, Christ-centered worship, counseling, Bible workshops, his own example, etc. — to help prevent the sheep from straying and to equip them against ravenous wolves.

Of course, some Christians will still be fools for the “majority rules” way of thinking in church. Despite even the best shepherd’s efforts, there will still be those sheep who stray and take some of their unsuspecting fellow sheep along with them. There will still be some sheep in the church who will get wooed by the wolves in sheep’s clothing who manipulate them with clever words, or “infect” them with false doctrine, or lure them with empty promises, or blind them with their bling, stadium-sized congregations and endorsements from celebrity demi-gods like Oprah.

Part of the solution is to remind the church that, even though we are indeed God’s precious sheep, we are still more than real sheep. (This may be obvious, but why don’t we act like it?) God has given each of us the mental, emotional and intellectual ability to think, to discern, to investigate and to make reasonable and fair decisions about matters of the Kingdom. He has given us the power to resist the mindless draw of the crowds and those who woo, lure and blind them. And He has given us the instructions for measuring right from wrong based on what His Word says and not on what the majority says. Because God’s Word is what really rules.

Please remember, the majority was wrong in the case of Joshua and Caleb versus their fellow spies; and the majority was wrong when they demanded Christ’s brutal crucifixion. Hold on to the truth that God’s Word rules over the majority — especially in this day and age when the majority of people around you, even some fellow believers, are becoming less and less tolerant of your strong faith in Christ and your reliance on the scriptures. (See the Why I’m Not Reluctant page.)

Let this be a regular refrain as you keep your focus on Jesus the Lord: When it comes to matters of His Kingdom, as the majority rules, the majority fools; and as it fools, it can lead to the fool’s destruction.

Please share your thoughts by commenting below. I will endeavor to respond as soon as I can.

Jesus Died for This?

“I have come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly” (John 10:10b)

If the “life” that Jesus referred to here is manner of life, lifestyle or way of life on earth, then how do you explain the fact that so many Christians around the world are suffering for the Faith? Besides, why would the rich in this world need to come to Jesus for that?

My big brother Doug accepted Jesus Christ shortly after seeing “The Exorcist” when it first came out in the 1970s. It scared him so much, he had to sleep with the light on for two days even though he was already grown and on his own!

He saw it at a time when he was searching for answers in life, first being into astrology during that period. He was searching for a firm foundation to believe in. So, after seeing that movie, he changed direction and started going to church.

Understand, this was a big deal, because we were not a religious family. To make matters worse, at least from our agnostic/atheistic perspective at the time, Doug quickly became one of those annoying, zealous hell-fire-and-brimstone Christians with nothing else to talk about every time he came over.

Soon, because of the church he started going to, that zeal extended itself to the “Word Faith” doctrine so that, in addition to needing Jesus, we also needed to watch our words because they have creative power, even power over life and death (Proverbs 18:21, taken way out of context). Doug was so into this “name it and claim it” way of thinking and its close, natural companion, the “Prosperity Gospel,” that it seemed to almost consume him. It puts a heavy emphasis on material success and among its tenets is that you have to be very specific about what you desire from the Lord.

Doug started speaking the things he wanted into existence, or at least he tried: a particular wife, a mansion specifically in Pacific Grove, a certain make and model luxury car, etc. He was following the formula to the tee, and yet, not surprisingly, he did not get most of what he “confessed.” I don’t know all of what Doug was praying for in life, and although his prayers weren’t answered exactly as he had confessed them, he did marry a wife he completely adored, had a comfortable home in an L.A. suburb, two beautiful children, a steady job and a reliable Toyota sedan.

What I do know most of all is that years later, following one unanswered “confession” after another after another, Doug got increasingly disillusioned. His foundation in Christ, in my opinion, was eventually shaken. Then, after years of trying to bolster that foundation of belief, he started talking about mysticism and then became a Gnostic. (Gnosticism is a false religion that combines some elements of Christianity with mystical, occultic concepts.)

After years of thinking Gnosticism was the answer, in 2005 Doug eventually alienated himself almost completely from the family. By this time I had been a Christian for more than 20 years, but he said he didn’t want to have anything to do with Charlton and me anymore because we didn’t believe in the same God. I was devastated. Devastated more because of what this might mean for his eternity than because my big brother didn’t want to speak to me anymore, and I really love my only big brother.

A few months later, in early January 2006, out of the blue Doug emailed me. It was a nice message encouraging me to keep standing up for the Faith regardless of what our family (they all still haven’t accepted Jesus) or anyone else says or thinks. I was encouraged that maybe his conversion to Christ really was authentic way back when, that maybe he just had a long struggle with doubt after all those years of disappointment with the Word Faith/Prosperity “gospel,” and that maybe he was finally coming back around. This hope was bolstered by the fact that his best friend from those early Word Faith days had stayed close to him like a brother through all those spiritually tumultuous years. (Thank you, Pastor Ron and Louise Johnson.)

Two weeks later, four days after his 51st birthday, Doug died suddenly of heart failure.

Why tell you this story? Am I saying that the Word Faith Movement/Prosperity “Gospel” killed my brother? Of course not, not at all! There are too many other factors that I know about, and I’m sure many that I don’t, that came into play with Doug’s unexpected death.

But I am giving him as an illustration of why the doctrine is so problematic. My brother’s story, while admittedly being from my perspective only based on my conversations with and observations of him over a 20-plus year period, is just one of countless others I know of first-hand where failure of the Word Faith/Prosperity doctrine has injured God’s precious sheep. Too many people are told to come to Jesus so they can have a better life now, and so they respond; but when their material status in life doesn’t really change as much as promised if they followed the formula, they falter or rebel.

Don’t get me wrong. People, including my brother, are very much to blame for following false doctrine so blindly. They won’t be able to pass the buck on their pastors when it’s judgement time for believers, because God will say, “But didn’t you have your own Bible, and don’t you know how to read and understand it for yourself? Can’t you think for yourself?” Scriptures repeatedly warn the sheep to beware of false teachers who teach that material gain is godliness and to leave those churches. However, God will also definitely hold pastors accountable for what they teach. For example, for accountability on both sides of this coin, read 1 Timothy Chapter 6 and Colossians 3:1-6.

While my brother started out understanding that you need Jesus for forgiveness of sins, I can’t help but think that his focus on his own material prosperity slowly but surely diminished or overshadowed the true Gospel of forgiveness of sins in his own mind. The more the formula wasn’t producing the promised results, the more he became obsessed with trying; and the more he kept trying, the more he got disillusioned; and the more he got disillusioned, the more it affected his faith in the Lord.

Again, this is only my own opinion. The point is, is that what Jesus died for, to give us a better life now? “Too many houses, too many cars, too much money” as one televangelist put it?  If so, then how does that apply to Christians who are being imprisoned, condemned, tortured and killed for their faith? Besides that, how does the promise of “your best life now” make Jesus attractive to the uber-successful like Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates, Oprah Winfrey or Jay Z who are having a better than best life already?

Followers of the mega-popular Word Faith/Prosperity “gospel” point to John 10:10 as proof out of Jesus’ own mouth that He wants us to enjoy life to the fullest here on earth. Jesus is talking and says in the second part of verse 10, “I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.

“BAM!”, material prosperity proponents will say, “abundant living in your face!”

But slow your roll there, buddy! A simple and honest reading of the context easily reveals that the “life” Jesus is talking about is not manner of life but life as the opposite of death. In other words, eternal life with God as opposed to eternal separation from God. Just read verse 9 and 11 with verse 10.

Isn’t eternal life truly the more abundant kind of life Jesus Christ died on the Cross to give us? Especially when you consider the alternative? Indeed, that’s what the Greek word for “more abundantly” in verse 10 means: “above the ordinary measure.” What kind of life is above the ordinary measure of just being alive, other than to live forever in the glorious presence of Almighty God in heaven?

Hallelujah! That’s what Jesus died for!

If more preachers taught that truth, imagine how many souls like my brother Doug’s would have been spared the great disillusionment that comes with the false promises of the Word Faith/Prosperity “gospel.” Imagine how many precious sheep would be more content in this life, filled with hope regardless of their earthly status because they’re focused more on the abundant life to come in heaven. Imagine how much stronger their faith in Christ would be if they weren’t constantly told that it’s their fault if their prayers go unanswered. Imagine how less resentful and bitter people would be about church and preachers, and maybe even Jesus Himself, if they were taught the eternal benefits of following Jesus — eternal salvation, fellowship of the saints, peace through the storms, strength to endure hardships, uncommon favor when and where it really counts, eternal rewards in heaven for good fruit produced for God’s glory here, etc.

I hope my brother Doug came to the end of his life re-dedicated to Jesus as his Lord and Savior. I don’t know for sure, unfortunately. But since there’s nothing I can do about that now, I can only pray and proclaim to anyone who will hear it: Don’t diminish Christ’s blood by promoting or following the prosperity doctrine like my brother did. It is a shaky foundation. It appeals only to the desparate, not to mention the selfish and the greedy. If we’ll be honest, it seems to work mostly for the preachers who teach it; and it is meaningless to nonbelievers who are already living their best life now.

Is it okay for Christians to aspire for “above the ordinary measure” of material prosperity in this life? Sure, but just as long as you realize that’s not what Jesus died a brutal death on the Cross for. Thank You, Lord, for Your sacrifice!

Please share your thoughts. Leave a comment by clicking on the title of this article above. Also, become a fan of my Facebook page at www.facebook.com/TheReluctantFirstLady.